Some Things I Learned from my Oma

It’s been a little over a year since my Oma, grandmother on my dad’s side, passed away. She was such a huge part of my life, all my grandparents were. It’s a bit lonelier in the world now that they’ve all passed, but I’m a better person because I was able to know and spend so much time with them. Also, I feel very blessed to know all of Brent’s grandparents who are still living except his maternal grandmother, Nanny.

My Oma Wilma was a beautiful, hard working woman who never failed to impress with her ease for conversation. She always made you feel loved and well taken care of. She lived to be 90 years old and lived six years alone after my Papa Jack passed.

Usually, the boys and I would stay a night or two with her during spring break– the boys had such a great time. I always enjoyed talking with her early in the morning before the boys woke up. You could count on her having the freezer stocked with some kind of ice cream treat, usually drumsticks.

Here are a few things she taught me:

Work hard and save your money but shopping is fun too. She was a career woman who always made time for family. I remember spending the night with her when I was a child. After working Monday through Friday on Saturday morning she would be down on her hands and knees scrubbing the kitchen floor. She and her husband valued saving money and finding bargains. Oma Wilma loved to shop and was an exceptional gift giver.

It’s okay to let your kids nap until Kindergarten. As a child, she kept taking naps at home right up to the time she started Kindergarten.

Call people on the phone and stay connected. She was always our family hub knowing all the updates on everyone. She kept our family close.

Breakfast is an important part of the day. For breakfast, she would serve the most delicious items. One of my all time favorites is her coffee cake, here is a similar recipe. (Note: use butter instead of shortening and crushed pecans instead of coconut) It doesn’t get much better than this on a Saturday morning. To make it even more like Oma serve with scrambled eggs and little glasses of juice.

Having a relationship with Jesus is key. This life will give you many challenges and seem to be more than you can bear. Jesus will get you through. She also taught me that attending church is important.

Remember your kids want to please you. Once when I was potty training Grant I was telling her how difficult it was and how frustrated I was getting with the process. She told me that he’ll get it and that he wants to please me. That was so impactful because although I knew he was not being defiant it sometimes felt like he was intentionally not getting it. He just needed more time to learn and when my perspective changed to realize how much he wanted to please it was much easier to handle all the accidents. I believe this is still true today, our kids really do want to please us.

Support your home team. She was a HUGE OKC Thunder fan. She watched every game with her orange and blue blanket draped over her legs and even chatted on the phone with her cousin during most of them (see stay connected above).

Use your fancy dishes. Don’t let them just collect dust. Make memories by using them for special occasions. I still remember the way her cedar sideboard smelled as we opened it up to set the table for Thanksgiving lunch. I inherited a set of her fancy dishes. We used them at our little family Christmas dinner this past year. It helps me feel connected to her.

Family is very important. Stay close and connected. Plan gatherings for holidays and special events. Take trips together it doesn’t have to be elaborate just a simple camping trip provides wonderful memories. Once she mentioned that looking back at all the trips and vacations she took in her life the ones with the whole family were her favorite.

Dessert after a meal is a wonderful thing. This is a good one I remember her serving. And ice cream, don’t forget the ice cream.

You are never too old to have style. She was still bringing it at 90 years old. She always had her hair cut and styled in a way that looked natural and put together. She was not afraid to wear bright colors and had excellent taste in clothing. Her nails were trimmed neatly and she wore very little makeup. Her natural beauty shined through.

Finally, listen to Michael Bublé. She was a big fan. Life is so short, take time to enjoy it.

My Oma Wilma loved to laugh. It brings a smile to my face now just thinking about her laughing. She was such a special person to me. Loss is hard and even after a year the pain of her not being here is very real. I choose to be thankful for all the years we had together and what a gift it was to have a grandmother like her.

What are some things your grandparents taught you? I’d love to hear.